I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
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