Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
I will be naked everywhere
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
Randomize
