Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Randomize
