K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
