Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Randomize
