He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
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