i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
The woman at walgreens tried to sell me clearance condoms with my fake eyelashes. Does it look like I get laid?
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
