Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
