She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
Randomize
