Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Randomize
