I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize
