we're blogging at a bar
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Sorry about my life...
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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