Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
Lo siento on account of my penis...
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
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