Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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