forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I need a beard to bite.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Randomize
