At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
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