Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize
