I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Randomize
