I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
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