I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize
