Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
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