I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
birth control should be required to get into college
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Randomize
