he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
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