I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize
