His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
