well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize
