Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Randomize
