so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
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