I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
