I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
