What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
