I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
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