Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Randomize
