Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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