How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize
