i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
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