Pappa wants mamma naked
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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