what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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