how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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