I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Randomize
