my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Randomize
