Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Quick, to the slutcave!
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
