As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Randomize
