nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
