I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
