i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
I need to align my fucking chakras
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
Randomize
