i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
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