She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
Randomize
