im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
