I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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